Hooah officially banned

Pentagon – A new revision to AR 600-20 is set to release before the end of the month. While little has changed since the Army Regulation was updated last month, a notable change to a popular slogan used in the Army has been made. “Hooah” is a term soldiers have used for decades, and it’s on its way out the door. Hooah can signify agreement, disapproval, acknowledgement, a sense of well being, or a myriad of other responses depending on the context of the situation.

“I hate that word,” Sergeant Major of the Army Michael Grinston stated. “It’s a brainless response, it sounds brutally idiotic, and I want to choke the life out of every soldier I meet who responds to me with this word.” ***

General McConville, Chief of Staff of the Army, simply shrugged his shoulders and signed the new revision immediately according to his aides who witnessed it.

“General McConville backs SMA Grinston 100%” stated LTC Garry Clonch, an aide-de-camp to the General. “That word has always been for enlisted and doesn’t get used around officer circles very much. When it does, the guilty officer is usually shunned by his or her peers very quickly for being a dunce. The General didn’t think twice when the SMA said it had to go.”

The Army said it would be open to the force providing suggestions for a new word, just as long as it sounded strong and aggressive and didn’t completely embarrass the Army like the old word did.

***Not an actual quote


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