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Bethesda, MD – Walter Reed Hospital, the DOD’s premiere hospital, failed to account for the amount of personnel staying at the facility and has run out of turkey legs for Thanksgiving.

“I’m really disappointed,” said SGT Joe Culver, a patient of the hospital and double leg amputee. “Everyone wants a leg on Thanksgiving. Guess I’ll just have to make do with the wings they have available.”

Walter Reed has promised to focus on their logistical shortfalls for next year.

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